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Yikes McGee: Songs

The Duel

(Yikes McGee)
At the Republican National Convention, 2004, Senator Zell Miller hollered at Chris Matthews, "I wish we lived in the day where you could challenge a person to a duel. Now, that would be pretty good."
THE DUEL
Zell Miller of Georgia called out
Chris Matthews of Hardball to a duel
At sunrise in the town
Choose your weapons

If it's pistols at 10 paces
I'd be interested in going
But I do hope Matthews wins
That would be cool.

Zell Miller doesn't know how to talk to people
Zell Miller has been lately such a fool.
Chris Matthews argued loudly with Zell Miller
So Miller challenged Matthews to a duel.

At sunrise in the square
Two men will stand
Hoping... maybe praying to win
Zell Miller can't remember
How he got there really
But there's Chris Matthews staring him down
With a cool Clint Eastwood grin

In fact Matthews looks a lot like a gunslinger
His hands poised by the handles of his guns
His fingers twitch as Miller scans his memory
For a hint of which pecadillo
Must've finally come undone

What led him to be standing
In the middle of the street
In the center of town
Facing Chris Matthews
Wearing a holster
Squinting into the sunrise
Getting shot down.

Was it something that I said,
Miller wondered aloud
I know I said a mouthful or two
Was in something too insulting
Or was it just a viscious lie?
I've been feeling kinda crazy
And I am so dissappointed
I don't know who to blame
Did I blame you?

Matthews to his credit
Was feeling kinda guilty
Maybe I did something wrong
To cause this scene?
I don't think that I'm that pushy
But if you've got the goods
Or you lie to me
I'm gonna try real hard
To get you to come clean

Zell Miller doesn't know how to talk to people
Zell Miller has been acting like a fool.
Chris Matthews argued loudly with Zell Miller
But that's no reason for Miller to challenge Matthews to a duel
You can't just challenge someone to a duel

Now as the sun had risen
The crowd was getting restless
Zell thought I'm opposed to suicide
I wish I lived in the day
when you could run away from a duel.
Then he raised up his pistol
Pulled the trigger
And he died.
Matthews got 'im right between the eyes.

Matthews sighed a sigh of relief
Said, I hope y'all got a picture of that.
Matthews accused Miller
Of not waiting for the count.
I guess Matthews gets the final word on that

Chris Matthews goes on home, the victor
Put his guns up on the shelf
Says, next week honey,
I'm gonna make some easy money
I'm just gonna interview myself
From now on
I think I'll just interview myself.